An Homage to a Beautiful Decade in my Apartment. 2012-2022.

March 10, 2022

An Homage to a Beautiful Decade in my Apartment. 2012-2022.

After 10 years of living in my cozy, small, 1950’s-style studio apartment in Sherman Oaks Los Angeles, my home, I finally moved. I moved in with my partner on the other side of the city, and I am very happy. All my friends keep asking how I am feeling about leaving my place, since they know I love it, and because it was such a community-centered space for these 10 years. I keep telling them the same thing: I am not that sad. But, I know that the day will come when I write an essay about the space.

That day has arrived! Where to begin?

My childhood. I grew up with a single father who had no business raising a baby girl on his own. Yet, he tried his best. We never, ever, had a clean, functional home. Ever. Sleepovers? Not an option. Any kind of social gathering in our home or apartment? Never. So when I moved into my space in 2012, I took pride in keeping it clean, and functional. Over time, it became a little less collegiate and more artsy, more scholastic, and more cozy. I really made it mine. And it gave me so much pleasure to have people over. So I did: so many friends have stayed here in times of need; I have hosted international friends, bike tourists; thrown parties; hosted small dinners. I loved this part of having a clean, functional home. I was giving myself what I always wanted.

There are a couple friends, my closest friends, who feel particularly close to the space. And then there’s one friend… who I have shared so many moments here with. When her life was changing, moving, shifting, and as she found her pace in this world; my place was always here. This friendship means so very much to me. In looking thru photos of 2013-2018, I found so many gorgeous moments of us together in my place and in my kitchen. I'll mostly place them at the end, but leave you with this gem:

And then there’s all the other friends… countless beautiful friends… who’ve shared time with me here.

My love, in my favorite spot to capture people.

And then, there's my bae-bor, one of my best friends and firm soul-sister who I met here in the building. She lived here almost as long as I did. So many memories, so many great chats, in and out of the "complex," nearly always inhabited by single females. So many moments...

And then there’s the stages of life. When I first moved into this place, I was simply looking for a cheap place to call my own. At first, I didn’t want to pay a whopping $895 (!!!) for such a small space. But then, I considered the location (a bit far from downtown/mid-city, but walking distance to a lot of important places), the hardwood floors, and the cute original 1950’s aesthetic. I wanted to stay in the valley to keep my move simple and cheap (I was 23, and completely independent!), since I had been living in Van Nuys. I was in a new relationship, but he lived in Sacramento. I was working at Planned Parenthood in Burbank at the time, making about 19k a year :'(. And so I said yes. I moved in in 2012. About 2-3 days a week, I’d ride 50 minutes by bike to work in Burbank, the other days I would drive. After that job, I started grad school at UCLA, where I did two masters 2013-2016. I would ride my bike and then take the bus, when it was the 761 line heading over Sepulveda. They changed the bus route, and I ended up caving and getting a parking permit and driving to school over Beverly Glen. UCLA is not really that far from Sherman Oaks, it’s a shame there’s no easy quick way to get there.

Anyways… then, I worked for Sentient Research for four years, where I worked from home. This is when my home stopped being my sanctuary. I had little space for relaxation and respite, and had to make sure to get out of the house every day. It was a chore. There were many pros and cons to this job, and working from home, but needless to say, I was happy to quit this job in February of 2020. I left my place, subletted it to a friend, and set off to Brazil. I planned to be in Brazil for three months; I was there for one week after the WHO declared COVID-19 a global pandemic.

When I came back to my country and my space in March of 2020, and took a nice long break from so many things, this is really when I developed a close relationship with my space and with myself. I was single, and spent a lot of time alone. Like, almost all my time alone. And my space - it was not for working, it was just for me. And not only that - I wasn’t working. So I got to just take good care of myself, enjoy my time, learn and practice new skills, and deepen my activism. I was so grateful, and so in love with my home. I enjoyed a full year of that - so much healing from my 9-5, from the hustle, the speed of urban life. I slowly started working again - not full-time (never again, fingers crossed!), but doing work that was fulfilling and compensated me well, and continuing my community and activist work. And then, I fell in love. And now it’s time to merge life under one roof. I am sad, yes, that I will be losing my space. But more - I’m feeling ready. Ready for a new space, a new chapter. A life of daily companionship with my dear partner. I’ve long felt that I had outgrown my space, but what kept me there was the cheap rent, how much moving sucks, and a general satisfaction with my space and what I had made of it. So how perfect that I get to move into a new space… with ease, grace, and in a deep loving relationship.